Dear Marcella—

This is a tough one, because at this early stage of the romance, you don’t want to turn your new guy off by making him feel insecure, or think that you’re overly concerned with superficial appearances. Still, if fashion is important to you, and you’re intent on trying to inspire your man to turn up the style volume, you definitely need to take action. Besides, he’s got to realize that style aesthetics turn you on, and him pulling up his fashionable socks will only make him more attractive to you.

First, you have to make sure he knows how much you appreciate attention to detail and the whole notion of dressing up. Take him window-shopping, or pore over men’s fashion magazines together, letting him know how amazing you think he’d look in some of the clothes and accessories you see. Find out what appeals to him. You might even surprise him with a subscription to a men’s fashion magazine. That would definitely be dropping a hint! Introduce him to fashion in fun ways. It may take a bit of an investment for you at first, but buy him a fabulous shirt, or sweater, or tie—something he might never buy for himself. And tell him how good it makes you feel to see him wear it. I’m not suggesting you give your new boyfriend an instant make-over. After all, you don’t want to appear too opinionated, over-bearing, or just plain bossy. But if you pump him up by telling him how attractive you already find him, and how much more of a turn-on he’d be if he stepped up his style just a bit, chances are he’ll try to please you.

I think many men really do harbour a desire to dress well, and indulge in fashion. The trouble is, many of them still don’t feel confident in making their own style choices, or don’t think they can afford to dress in a stylish way–a misconception, because as we all know, great style doesn’t necessarily cost big bucks. This is your chance to not only share your fashion expertise and style philosophies, but also help your man to see the fun in strutting it.

Now, while I am encouraging you to attempt to turn the style lights on for your beau, there’s no promising he’ll respond the way you want him to. Some people are dead set against embracing the joys of fashion, and just not that into “amping up” their dress sense, as you put it. If he’s reluctant to follow your lead, you may just have to learn to ignore his uninspired style of dressing, and concentrate on all the other cool things about him. One thing’s for certain: True love will find a way.